Un-Limiting God, Part 1
In the earlier part of the past twelve years of my personal journey with Christ I came to a point of feeling utterly alone. I had my family, friends and people around me, but I was alone –utterly alone. I had exhausted just about every resource I could find that might give me even a glimpse of finding the answers for getting out of this deep dark Pit of confusion, anxiety and despair. Each and every “resource” I tried which included reading some of the best books on the market (both Christian and secular), listening to the most well-known television and Internet sermons, and even closer to home, talking to some of the most popular preachers in my local area, all fell short of the complete answer. Granted, I got glimpses of understanding, awareness to some of the problems, and great advice is some cases, but I did not get the full measure of what God was doing in and with me. Yet this searching was the most significant part of the journey, simply because God taught me through experience that the answer in not in man, but in Jesus Christ only. I found myself guilty of leaning on the tools God was giving me rather than the source of the tools – Jesus Himself.
Each time I wandered off trying to figure out the answers to make my life better, I was sorely disappointed and fell back to that feeling of loneliness in the deep dark Pit. One of the most disappointing times was when I sought the counsel of a local pastor that I just knew was a spirit-filled man of God. His teary-eyed sermons sounded so convincing to his great wisdom. Yet to my great dismay, all I received from this individual was a feeling of being totally unworthy and only a 1% chance of ever getting the answer to my prayers. This by far was the most unsettling news. At first, I questioned my perception of the meeting and tried again months later only to come out with the same disillusionment. It was not until a few years later that I found out that many others who sought this man’s counsel experienced a similar disappointment.
However, God meant it for good -this became a major turning point in my journey. This time in my disappointment I decided to take it directly to the boss – God. I asked Him to show me if what this man said was true. Much to my astonishment the Lord addressed every issue that this man said, and the damage he was doing. It was not in just one resource but several. The most significant was from the book, “God Meant it for Good” by R. T. Kendall. Dr. Kendall had experienced a similar situation early in his walk with God. He was on fire with the Holy Spirit and had come to a point that he wanted to share his joy and great revelations with the one person in his family that represented to him a sturdy Christian foundation – his Grandmother. When he approached her with his revelations she blew him out of the water and left him with great disappointment and sadness.
Dr. Kendall recalls in his book taking this disappointment to God. The Lord led him to the very center of the Bible – Palms 118:8 – It is better to trust in the LORD, than to put confidence in man. He concluded that God put it on his heat that if we put our trust in man, God will show us just how frail they really are and we will be disappointed every time. Our trust belongs to God alone.
It was at this point that the scales really begin to come off of the eyes of my heart. I was running around trying so desperately to figure God out. I was guilty of trying to put “God-in-a-box” so I could lean on my own understanding and thus find the answers to the questions that were plaguing me. It was at this point I had to totally surrender, “my own understanding.”
It was not about finding the answers, but rather the Answer. And this can only be done through a relationship with Jesus Christ through the power of His Holy Spirit. This revelation was a major part of my journey of learning to un-limit God and put my trust in Him alone.
Simply Devoted to Jesus Christ,
Regina M. Dick
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